As ashamed as I am, I have to admit, I have kept up with this trash-heap of a phenomenon. Not because I like it….but ya know….it is very hard to look away from a train-wreck. Honestly I am very glad MTV wised up and started cancelling this joke of a “documentary”. This show is the FARTHEST thing from a documentary. It is (was) the most scripted, manipulated piece of garbage on television now. And MTV obviously thinks its audience is extremely stupid if they think for a moment that anyone takes this show seriously anymore. (Like we are really supposed to believe these girls have financial issues when their hair, makeup, and nails are professionally done in every scene)
I could go on and on about the show itself, but that is really not the purpose of this post. I was thinking the other day (while seeing a commercial for the “reunion” show that was conveniently taped a year ago and has NO relevance to the present day since MTV REALLY stays on top of things) If I had to give each girl on one of these 2 shows a letter grade, based on their actions on the show as well as the upbringing they had...…here is the order I would grade and why:
1. Catelynn Lowell-A
I have to hand it to this girl and her fiancé/ex-stepbrother. These two had the shittiest upbringing of ANY of the cast members and still managed to turn out the most “together” of anyone. I honestly have no idea how you are this level-headed when you have a crackhead father who abandons you and a white trash alcoholic mother with severe anger issues. I really cannot figure out the x-factor here. Even from the beginning, Catelynn and Tyler were smart and selfless enough to realize that they were not ready to be parents. While giving their daughter up for adoption had to have been the hardest thing they had or ever probably will do in their entire lives, they loved her enough to know that they wanted better for her than what they could give her. They did not want her growing up in the awful circumstances they did, so they put her above themselves and gave her to a family that could give her what they wanted for her. There is so much controversy over why MTV chose them for the series because they “really aren’t parents”. These two ignored their own selfish wants in order to give their daughter what she deserved. If that is not a parent then I don’t know what is…
2. Maci Bookout-B+
It is obvious that Maci is a girl from the south who had a good upbringing and just made some dumb decisions. Although she got annoying and stupid in the last season, it did not affect the happiness or well-being of her son, Bentley. (Biiiiintley) Any drama surrounding Maci was typically just stupid surface-level high school problems with her baby daddy and never really affected her mothering skills. The reason I like Maci is even though she was lucky and has good parents who provide for her and are supportive, she still is the main provider for her child. Any time she dealt with relationship or custody drama, it was very easy to see that Bentley was always her priority and was kept out of it. The only thing I will ding her on is bringing men in and out of Bentley’s life the way she did towards the end.
3. Kailynn Lowry-B
Although she was a manipulative and emotional basket case at times, you can’t totally blame it on her. First off, she had some abandonment issues. Her mom, although present at times did not seem like the best support system, and she supposedly has bi-polar disorder. That doesn’t excuse the domestic violence and her quick ability to make herself the victim in any given situation without even considering the feelings of her baby daddy. But it’s whatever. If anything she was the most boring of any of the girls to follow. I guess that just means she is normal…
4. Leah-Messer-Simms-Messer-Calvert(??)-B-
Ok first off….let me just say, I admire anyone who has twins. That HAS to be difficult, especially one that has special needs. Although she is a bit erm…uneducated sounding (“Is the schools good here?”), you can tell she genuinely cares for her daughters and she does her best to co-parent with her baby daddy/ex husband Corey. Ok. There is the positive. Now for the negative. I don’t get why this girl thinks she has any right to play any sort of victim in any hard situation she is in. She puts it on herself. SHE cheated on Corey a week before her wedding but then gets upset because he buys a new truck and it was supposed to be their “house money”. Uh…YOU cheated and YOU filed for divorce? But I guess common sense comes with maturity and she clearly doesn’t have either. Also, the whole Jeremy-Corey love triangle was just pathetic. This Jeremy guy is pathetic…but whatever I guess he just really wanted to reproduce with Leah, as he kept getting her knocked up. On a side note, I have heard several stories about her house being disgusting and she never cleans it and her kids eat off the dirty floors so that is why she gets a B-. Maybe it should be a C?
5. Chelsae Houska-C
Ok help me out here….does this girl think that stupid=cute? If that is the case then she is one of the cutest girls I have ever seen. Aslo, if you look up whiney, lazy, spoiled baby in the dictionary there will be a picture of her hair, because that it all that will fit in the picture. Good lord where do I even begin?? First of all, her parents are not doing her ANY favors by spoiling her the way they do. (It took her HOW long to get a G.E.D while she had NO job and always had a babysitter at her disposal?) And what was her excuse for missing so much beauty school? Oh right, the fact that she is so hung up on her douche bag of a baby daddy, (the same guy that called his child a “mistake” and her a “fat stretch-mark bitch”) that NOTHING else in life matters… All I ever hear when I think of her is her whiney-ass voice (“Addddaaaammmaaaah!”) She gotta cute lil baby though and IS an attentive mom when she IS with Aubrey so I will give her that. I just wish she had a few more brain cells in that giant mess on her head.
6. Amber Portwood-D (Eligible for make-up homework)
Amber made me the angriest of anyone when I would watch this stupid show, as anyone would agree. She was just a horrible excuse for a mother, whether it be the domestic violence, the constant cursing and screaming at her baby-daddy Gary Shirley, IN FRONT of her daughter Leah I might add, or her God-Awful nails/hair/make-up and press on eyelashes that made her look like some sort of witch/gypsy/angry raccoon. There is nothing that wouldn’t set this girl off and she used any opportunity to scream, yell and blame others as her life spiraled out of control. If you watched her enter and leave rehab several times on the show and even attempt suicide, it was clear that she had some severe mental issues that she was hardly doing anything to resolve. After having CPS take her daughter away and give Gary full custody, Amber finally ended up with a 5 year prison sentence, which she is currently serving and may even be released early for good behavior.
What is interesting to me is that Dr. Drew did a TV special interviewing Amber in prison. Here is what I took from the interview: She was extremely effed-up on the show. The drug use took control of her life and her mental health. She is not a bad person, but she allowed herself to succumb to drug abuse and behaved horrendously, (which there is NO excuse for but you will have to give the drugs and poor mental health some of the blame for that). As Amber talked to Dr. Drew, she had never seemed more self-aware. One thing I admire is unlike ANY other girl on this show, she owned up to her mistakes. She sat with Dr. Drew and said, I was full of drugs, I didn’t want to give them up, I became materialistic, my daughter was not a priority, and I knew it was jail or death. She chose jail for herself because she knew it was the only option left that would force her to get her act together, since rehab clearly didn’t work. I am curious to see how she responds once she is put back into the real world again. I honestly hope the best for her and can tell she really does love her daughter. I am hoping this jail sentence is some “make up homework” and that she can become a thriving mother and a functioning member of society again. Time will only tell….
7. Farrah Abraham-F
Ugh. I don’t even know where to begin with this chick. I honestly put her above Jennelle for one reason and one reason alone. She takes care of her daughter….sometimes. There. That being said, there is a multitude of reasons why I just don’t get this girl. When someone on the show tends to behave unfavorably, I try look for the reason why. I am no way a psychologist but it is interesting to read into the psychology behind things and I just can’t come up with any other reason besides she is bitter, hates the world, has an undeserved, narcissistic sense of entitlement, and is a nasty spoiled brat who is never in the wrong and feels like the world OWES her something. That sum it up? Her attitude towards everyone and everything is appalling and she will continue to isolate herself from everyone if she doesn’t change. (Which I really doubt she will). She seems to think she is allowed to treat others like garbage because she is this magnificent being who miraculously conceived a child young and ‘gave up everything’. Someone needs to tell her to look to her left and then to her right at one of the reunion shows and see that everyone else on this show is dealing with the same thing, and some in much worse situations than she, and they don’t have an enormous redwood tree trunk shoved up their ass the way she does. Her parents are just as weird and absolutely clueless, yet they also enable her to act the way she does, no matter how badly she treats them. She is a skanky fame-whore who will do anything (and I mean ANYTHING) for attention and not own up to any of her poor decisions. I believe she loves her daughter but only when it is convenient for her. I am sorry but the whole “I need to put my daughter on a plane back to Iowa” so I can whore around study was just…I don’t even know. The thing to me that was weird was if I put my son on a plane with his grandmother to go away for a month I would be an absolute wreck! I would be crying so hard that I would not be able to stand up straight. Farrah didn’t bat an eyelash the entire time, knowing her daughter was going away for a month. She eventually DID end up reuniting with Sophia and now takes her along to negotiate her porn contracts. What a wonderful role model this child has. Oh and come to find out she is now talking about how Catelynn Lowell has a weight issue?? Are you freaking kidding me? This girl needs to be launced into outer space because that is about as isolated as she is going to be in a few years…BLECH. I can’t talk about her anymore. Moving on…
And Finally….
8. Jennelle Evans-I (Incomplete. She is NOT a mother)
Well! Jennelle! I see ya wif Keefah and you was gettin’ HIGH! HIIIIGH!!! So GET OUT!!! And go live on da street WIF Ya Boooooooyfriend!!!! (hahahaha btw Barbara gets an ‘A’ for making me laugh) All joking aside…this girl IS a joke. The best think she could have done, she already did by letting someone else have custody of her son. She is in no shape to be anyone’s mother. It is blatantly obviously that she does not give two shits about Jace and really all she cares about is keeping her name in the tabloids and getting HIGH! HIIIIGH!!! I really have no other words for her. She is extremely dramatic, immature, stupid and just plain trash. Lucky for her, her mother does the best she can with Jace, even though she has some anger issues as well, but they tend to stem from her “bitch of a daughter”. I really feel sorry for Jace. It breaks my heart to see this poor child unconditionally love a mother who only conditionally loves him back. I really hope to God Barbara does her best with him. Otherwise I will take him! L He and Brady can play on our new slide for hours and have a blast. As for Jennelle….”Te hell with you! Rot in Jail!”
Meghan
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