The Top 10 Things That Annoy Me

First and foremost, I would like to wish a Happy Early Father's Day to all the daddies out there! Especially to the 2 hardest working dads I know! 1) My dad who worked his butt off to put himself through college and get a good job that provided well for my brother, sister and myself and also allowed him to retire fairly young! Good for you Dad! You deserve it! 2) My husband who still works his butt off at 2 jobs to provide for our own family! 2 more weeks till vacation honey! We deserve it!!

Secondly, I just realized today marks the 5 year anniversary of my college graduation. MAN do I feel old!! I have been living in the "real world" for 5 years now, and I can't even begin to tell you how much it feels like a completely different life than it was 5 years ago. Although there are many aspects from that life that I do miss, I would not trade it for the life I have now in a million years! Ok onto the fun stuff....

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Lately I have tried to be very careful with my words and how I say things so I do not offend people when I give an opinion. It is EXHAUSTING. Somebody always gets offended no matter what. It is so irritating to have to "walk on eggshells" all the time because that is just not the person that I am. The other day my husband told me he misses how mean I used to be…..??? I think what he meant to say was that he misses how I used to tell it like it is and not be afraid of what people thought. Now I just keep my mouth shut so I don’t offend anyone. Well not today my friends!! That is what THIS POST is for. I am going to tell you all how I feel about 10 random things that get on my nerves. And if you don’t like it….I really don't care. This is a blog, not a State of the Union Address! So without any further ado, here are 10 things that annoy me….

10.  People who post numerous amounts of  “selfies”.

Unless you are a 14 year old girl in her room with nothing better to do, please stop. People don’t sit at home and wait for you to upload pictures of yourself on Facebook. They have their own lives. You should think about getting one too. Also, what is with this whole “duck lips” phenomenon? You don’t look cute and you don’t look sexy. You look STUPID…and everyone is laughing at you…

9. People who mock others for getting "big boy jobs" who don't get real jobs themselves because they are so certain their crappy band is going to "make it".

Ok here is a news flash for all you "bad-asses" who are "sticking it to the man" and making fun of your peers because they went out and got "big boy jobs"....If you want to "make it" in the music business you need to be one of two things 1. Good and/or 2. Good-looking. There ya go. Some of you are neither. You play crappy music and work at McDonalds and live in crappy apartments while you are mocking people like me for getting a real job and supporting a family (yes I have a friend who actually got mocked for getting married, having a child and a career by his former high school friend). I am all about following your dreams. But you also have to be smart about it. While most people DO have a backup plan just in case they do not become THE GOD OF ROCK AND ROLL, those who do NOT are the ones I have usually found to be so cynical of people who work normal jobs.  All the while, you are creeping up on 30 with no real job experience and no education. Good Luck.

8.  People who say ANY the following phrases to expectant parents:

-“Sleep now because you won’t be getting much when the baby comes"

How is sleeping NOW going to make me less tired when the baby comes? This isn’t like storing up for the winter! Shut up.

-“Just wait. It gets worse!”

That comment not helpful. No one hears this and feels better after hearing it. Any idiot who says this is obviously just not thinking before they speak. But seriously, this can work in any situation. If someone is upset over something, they do NOT want to be told about how much worse it is going to get. Even if I am NOT upset over something, I HATE to be told that something is going to get worse. (life, parenting, a current struggle, ect...) Usually you get told this by someone who is pissed that it got worse for them. So they tell this to others so they can be made just as miserable. Sorry. It won't work. You can't make me miserable. Only yourself.

-“I know you are having a hard time with pregnancy, but I LOVED being pregnant!! I didn’t feel sick a single day and felt great!”

First of all, you are a freak of nature. Second, saying this to someone who is puking ALL day and ALL night is like going up to someone who is in a wheelchair and saying “I LOVE WALKING!!!!” You are not “making someone realize how blessed they are to be carrying a child” or whatever lame excuse you have for why you said that. You are simply being insensitive and gloating about how fortunate you were. While everyday I was grateful for this miraculous gift, it still usually sucked ass to be pregnant. No one who feels like they are on their death bed is going to be a perky, joyful sumbitch like you claimed to have been. If you LOVED being pregnant so much, good for you. But don't talk someone else out of how they are feeling because you think everyone's experience should be the same. And don't you DARE ever argue with a pregnant lady!


-“You need to have another one soon so your kids aren’t too far apart in age.” (Yes they guy changing my oil actually said this to me.)

Says who??? My son isn’t even 2. And I am 27 not 37!!! Quit acting like this is the Bible and I need to have all my kids by age 14!!!  Who cares if there is an age difference? Unless YOU are going to pay for them to be in college at the same time then shut it. And who says I am even having another one? Maybe YOU should have another one!

And while we are on the subject of kids….

7. Parenting “experts” who don’t have kids themselves.

Oh you BET someone went there with me!

Several have actually had the nerve. My favorite was a temporary co-worker who never shut her mouth about trying to tell me what I was doing wrong with my then infant child. This chick had a whole multitude of issues. (She still lived at home with her mom but tried to give people homeownership advice. She ALSO gave healthy eating tips while constantly stuffing her own face with cocoa pebbles) I once was nonchalantly talking about how Brady (who was 6 months old at the time) would wake up in the middle of the night and I would go in and find his paci and put it in his mouth for him and he would go right back to sleep. She tried to give me advice on how I shouldn’t do that because I was spoiling him. I almost gave HER advice on how to treat a roundhouse kick to the face….

6. People who think The Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise is real.

This is the dumbest show ever. It is not real life. It is not romantic. Anyone who thinks it is, is ignorant. This show gets more and more annoying every season. (If I hear Des say "This is so amazing" one more time, I will throw my wine glass at the TV). The people who go on this show have to be either living under a rock, or just on the show to get publicity. There is nothing on this show that ISNT manipulated. The people competing are kept in a house with no TV, books, cell phones, music, or ANY sort of connection to the outside world. This is done for one reason and one reason alone. To make them all go bat-shit crazy and make good TV. You do not fall deeply and passionately in love with someone that you spend 10 minutes a day with in a controlled environment. It just doesn't happen. Instead the producers take away every connection you have to the outside world so you become severely depressed and emotional and throw yourself at the first member of the opposite sex you interact with (aka: The Bachelor/Bachelorette). You think you are so in love, especially when you go on all these fantasy dates on steroids and think every minute of your life together is going to be JUST LIKE THIS!!! Sorry to say it ain't. People get engaged because they are told to by the producers SO IN LOVE and then Boom! The show ends, you get back to real life, get access to the outside world again, don't get anymore helicopter dates, and realize this douche you just got engaged to is well...a douche. But people continue to watch every season even though they know its garbage, and RealitySteve continues to spoil the end of every season and crap on every episode. I look forward to reading his posts and agreeing with every single word he puts on that page. If you don't know who he is, and you like to watch this show, you need to educate yourself real fast...www.realitysteve.com

5. People who ask how much I paid for my house.

Yes. I have actually been asked this more than once. Here is my answer…

If you want to know how much someone pays for their house, be a stalker look it up online. It is public record. Don’t ask someone to their face. It’s rude and awkward and none of your freakin' business anyway you douchetard!

4. Promise Rings

What the HELL is the purpose of this??? I want to smack girls who actually fall for this BS. Your boyfriend is either too cheap or just not ready to get you an engagement ring. But you are nagging him. So he gets you this to shut you up and buy more time. That’s it!! (I actually know a handful of people who have received a promise ring from a boyfriend and guess how many of them are STILL with their boyfriend? Yep. ZERO) Buying your girlfriend a ‘promise ring’ is what kids in high school do because they know nothing about life but manage to think they are somehow ready to get married. So because they are a minor and technically not allowed to get married without consent, they get a “pre-engagement ring.” For those of you who are adults…here’s a newsflash…You are old enough to get married. So if you get a ‘promise ring’ it just means you are not ready. Save yourself the money and just tell the girl you are not ready. Don’t do something lame like buy a promise ring. You are giving false hope and people are laughing at you….

3. People who complain about how BAD they have something TO someone who has it WORSE.

Do not complain about being “fat” to someone who weighs more than you! Do not complain about being tired to the mom of a newborn! Do not complain about driving 60 miles a day to someone who drives 80. Get the picture? You think this would be common sense, but there are some dumb asses out there that STILL do not get this concept.

When Brady was about 2 ½ months old and I just went back to work, I was freaking exhausted. I was waking up 1-2 times a night still to feed him and then working a full day, not to mention driving an hour both ways at the time (thank God not any more). Someone (who doesn’t have kids) was complaining that they had never worked a full time job before and it was exhausting them….but they could come right home and go to bed if they wanted...

During my heavier days, I also had skinny people complaining about putting on a little weight when I was failing miserably to take SOME of mine off!

I will be the first to admit that before I actually had to grow up, I probably did this as well. So if I have ever done this to anyone reading this, you have my sincerest apologies.  For those of you who have still yet to grow up and realize this, yes…I accept your future apology. ;)

2. Pregnant ladies who smoke, drink excessively or do anything else that harms their unborn child.

Mommy is too selfish to quit her addiction, so here, have some second-hand cancer with a side of birth defects. I actually worked with a girl when I waitressed in college who was 7 months pregnant and still took regular smoke breaks. Are your freaking kidding me???? Before any of you peg me as ignorant when it comes to addiction, here is a bit of background for you. When I was pregnant I was on Paxil, which is an anti-depressant/anxiety drug I should never have been on in the first place, but instead of realizing i was just a whiney 17 year old, the psychologist lady who knew me for an hour decided instead of talking to me, I just needed to be pumped full of a controlled substance. No big deal right? Anyway, thatis by far one of the hardest drugs to come off of. My doctor told me I needed to ‘wean’ myself off of it because it would be like the equivalent of coming off of heroine. But it was extremely dangerous to my unborn child. Being pregnant was bad enough, but having to come off of something my body had addicted itself to was just an added pleasure. Camping out on a bathroom floor for weeks and weeks at a time, while I had these little brain tremors was just lovely.  But you know what? I did it!  Today I take NO medication and I have a healthy son. So yes, I don’t know first hand how hard it is to stop smoking, shooting up ect… when you have been doing it for years. But I DO know firsthand how hard it is to experience withdrawal from an addiction (even though it was not an intentional addiction). But it CAN be done. My child was worth it. Isn’t yours???

And finally……..

1. Unwanted Advice!!!

Does anyone ever hear a song and feel like it was written specifically for them? That is how I feel about “King of Anything” by Sara Bareilles. Google the lyrics and you will understand.

Before anyone gets the impression that I ONLY mean parenting advice….I don’t. I hate being told what to do. Period. Yes, do not tell me how to raise my child, but also where to park, where to shop, why my pediatrician is wrong, how to handle my finances, my marriage, my free time, or any other stupid tid-bit of advice. It is not helpful. It is insulting. My child is happy. My car is in good condition. I never miss a payment on anything. My marriage is good. My family is healthy. And I am still breathing. There. You can NOW sleep at night knowing I am somehow managing to stay alive without your help.

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I cannot tell you how GREAT it felt to write these words. Especially since I am a “tell it how it is” type of person by nature. How therapeutic! I encourage any of you to make your own list of annoyances. Even if you just tell people off on paper that you throw away instead of writing it in a blog like me….it feels awesome!!!

I leave you with this.....

 A wise woman once said:










 “I’m not taking any crap from anyone!!!”



Have a blessed day.

Meghan